How should I say 'hello'?
亲吻还是拥抱？当心礼仪陷阱 作者：DAVID BARTRAM, 21ST CENTURY ST 时间：2008-09-24
来源：21世纪英文报第772期
acquaintance 熟人
console 安慰
daunting 令人生畏的
etiquette 礼节
hacker 黑客
nonchalant 冷淡的
transparency 透明
uptight 紧张的， 极端保守的
BONUS
Expression
be wary of
警惕的
Her parents are quite wary of her new boyfriend. They think he’ll only bring her trouble.
她的父母很警惕她交的新朋友。他们觉得他只会带来麻烦。
minefield
隐伏危机的事物
The new US president will have to face a minefield of national and international problems.
新的美国总统必须面对暗藏着危机的国际国内问题。
PICTURES of Lehman Brothers' employees appeared in newspapers across the world last week. Many who may lose their jobs were consoling each other by hugging.
But is this correct etiquette for greeting someone? Should you use a hug, a kiss or just a friendly handshake? Greeting people in the West can be a daunting prospect, and to make things worse habits are changing all the time.
With so many different social settings and relationships, one can easily get confused about how best to say “hello” or “goodbye”. And with an ever-expanding selection of greetings, from back-pats to hand-slaps, it can be hard to know where to start.
“It can be a minefield. There are so many rights and wrongs you are normally best off simply smiling and letting the other person take the lead,” suggests Ashley Spencer, a student from the UK.
Of course the main factor to consider is how well you know the person. As a general rule the closer you are to a person, the more intimate your greeting can be. However, even this is not always a rule that can be relied upon.
Consider this situation. You are in a bar with some friends and spot a work colleague of the opposite sex. You have known the work colleague for some time, but tend not to socialize outside of the workplace. How do you greet this person?
The BBC asked people this very question last year, and even though more than 20,000 people voted, no clear answer was decided.
The problem is that everyone has different ideas about the issue, and this can cause awkward situations. While some groups of close friends may kiss and hug each other when they meet, others may be more nonchalant.
Jasmine Gardner, a journalist from the UK, has her own system of greetings for different groups of friends. “School friends get one kiss, new acquaintances usually get a handshake and friends from university get a nod of the head for hello and goodbye. But most importantly, people I don’t particularly like, get nothing.”
The real answer is to be adaptable to all situations. If you offer a handshake but are approached for a kiss on the cheek, try and appear natural in accepting it. You need to strike a balance between not being over-familiar while also not appearing too uptight.
To further confuse the issue, there are different greetings between men and between women (See box). But whatever your approach to meeting and greeting, remember that if you are friendly, smiling and relaxed you should get along fine.
Different greetings
Man to man
Men can be wary of any attempt at physical contact. When you meet, a firm handshake is the best strategy. Look your new friend in the eye and smile, but do not hold on for too long. Between close friends a handshake is often seen as too formal, and they may use any number of hand-slaps or fist-bumps to greet each other.
Woman to woman
Female friends tend to be more physical in their greetings. Close friends will often hug and kiss, especially if they have not seen each other for a long time. However, this does not mean that you should instantly hug whenever you meet a new woman. A handshake is safe.
Man to woman
Attempting to kiss a woman you have just met can appear forceful. Offer a warm smile and a handshake. In a more formal setting, it can be appropriate to give a woman one or two kisses on the cheek. As you become closer friends, you may begin to hug or kiss.
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